A Lost Life
by JPandS
Summary: Setsuna reflects over her childhood life. One-shot.


Hi everybody JPandS here, and yes I'm writing another sad fic but it may not be as touching as "The Precious Heart of the Child" (or it may not even be touching) was but oh well. And I know I should be updating my other stories but I had to get this out of my head because I have been thinking about it all day. So here it is.

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Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

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"Mostly all my life I was locked up in the darkness with destiny forcing me to watch the future of all the people of the outside world. Sometimes I would be lucky and be able to go to the world outside of this prison for business purposes, but when I wasn't able to leave I spent my time trying to make this horrid place my home and sanctuary which I found was very hard." 

"But I wasn't always trapped in this imprisonment. I had a family…………..once." 

"My father though decided against being my father, because he was a coward that dated under aged women and accidentally got his 16 year old girlfriend, my mother, pregnant. When my mother found out that she was pregnant she got scared and told her parents, but unfortunately my grandparents disowned her and said that they wouldn't care for the child either."

"So she was forced to get a job so that she could get a place to stay. Then a few years later she had me and got pregnant again soon after, and the man fled like the one before him did. But he often said that he had a really good reason to but my mother didn't believe him and neither did I. After a few more years past she had the baby that turned out to be a boy, but there was something wrong with him, and the doctors said that he wasn't going to make it."

"So as I waited in the hospital for my little brother it turned out that he was going to make it, but only under a few circumstances. The doctors said that he had to take all of these shots and medicine for his heart and they said that failure to do so would kill him even if we forgot to give him one pill. And we also got news that my little brother was mentally disabled, and that he wasn't going to grow as quickly as regular kids did. And for some reason that hurt my mother a lot."

"As my brother grew older and went to school with me kids made fun of him so I took it upon myself to protect him from all the dangers of the world even if it meant my death. Then my mother started having problems as well. Because of her lack of sleep she got sick when I was 13 and my brother was 10, but she passed it off as a cold and even as it got worse she still said it was a little cold. But I knew better, and so did my brother. 

"So it was then that I vowed to my brother that I wouldn't allow our mother to be sick any longer, but I failed him."

"One fall was all it took to take my mother away, and it all happened in one day. And that day I'll never be able to forget."

*~*~Flashback~*~*

"Mom, are you okay?" asked a girl with long green hair that went to her mid thigh.

"Yes dear, what makes you think I wouldn't be?" the mother said tiredly. And before her daughter could answer the question she cut her off and said: "Why don't you just go and tell your brother to get ready to go."

"Ok mom." the girl said a little disappointed as she reluctantly went to grab her brother. But unbeknownst to her, her mother started to breath heavily and put her hand on the counter to keep her balance. Then the green haired girl came down the stairs with her brother to see her mother lying on the floor coughing and on the verge of falling unconscious. 

"MOM!" the girl yelled as she ran to the side of her mother on the verge of crying, but she decided against it. 'I have to be strong for my brother.' she constantly repeated in her mind and went to call 911. 

Then as she called them they didn't believe her because all they could think about was: 'Oh this is a 13 year old girl that is trying to pull our legs.' So no one came to her rescue and instead of calling again she went to her mother's side with her brother in tow not really understanding the situation.

Inside the kitchen their mother lay sprawled out across the floor with tears in her eyes as she watched her two jewels come towards her. "mama don't cry your face isn't happy when you cry." the little boy spoke for the first time. And the mother smiled at his words and kissed him on the cheek and signaled for them to come closer.

And she grabbed both of them into a tight hug and constantly apologized to them for not being strong and constantly told them to take care of each other. Then after a long while she let them both go and pulled her self up so she could see her kids at a better view and just stared at them with more tears in her eyes that the little boy kept wiping away.

"Mommy I think we should go now so we won't be late." the little boy said not quite understanding why his mother was saying all that stuff. "I'm sorry dear, but I can't go." the mother replied in a tired and raspy voice. "but I want you both to know that I love you very much and that I'm sorry *cough* that I wasn't strong *cough* enough for you guys." And with those words said she fell unconscious. 

And the two kids just sat there next to their mother and the little girl didn't know what to do. Her mother was gone and they had no money, and she had no idea how long they could stay in their own house. Then her train of thoughts were broken by her brother's voice. 

"Setsuna, is mom sleeping?" he asked as he hugged his mothers unconscious body. "Umm, y-yeah she's asleep." Setsuna choked out. "That's good." the little boy said happily. "Cause I think she was weally tired." 

"Yeah she was really tired." Setsuna replied softly. Then there was a knock at the door, it was the police. "Hello is your mother here?" one of the men asked with a serious tone of voice. "Yes she's sleeping in the kitchen." the little boy said with cheer in his voice.

"Well can you wake her up?" the cop asked. "No." Setsuna replied quickly. "We're not allowed to." But the cops didn't believe her and just forced their way into the house and said: "Ma'am we have received info that your house has called 911 for a false alarm, and I hope you know that's illegal." Then they slowed down as they saw her unconscious on the kitchen floor. And they called the ambulance. 

*~*~End of flashback~*~* 

"After they found my mother dead my brother's father showed up out of no where and said that he wanted the both of us, but I just wouldn't allow it after what he did to my mother. So I ran away with my brother and we slept in the streets. Then one night the man that wanted us found us and took us to his place. Then I ran away again but I couldn't get my brother."

"But I couldn't let my brother like that man, but I had already had a plan even before I ran away again. I didn't let that man find out that my brother needed all those shots and medicine, so my brother died. I thought I was doing the right thing but now that I look back at it. I was wrong, and now I regret ever being born."

"I've made a lot of vows as a child and none of them were accomplished. I had failed them all. And for this I can never forgive myself. And when I think about this it becomes easier for me to make this place my sanctuary. Because of my horrible past I want to be locked away from all humans and evils."

"Whoever said darkness was evil, was wrong. Darkness is just simply another form of peace, it's the only peace that I can ever accept."

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Okay that's it. Its not really what I wanted to write, but I've been rushed by my cousin and I really need to get this out of my head, and I know it sucks and that the ending was corny, but I had to get it out of my head so I could be able to do my other fics. Anyways tell me if you like it and if I get enough reviews I may even do a sequel. 


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